Wednesday, August 01, 2007

BEEFCAKE!!!

7 months ago I hauled my sorry ass for a long delayed trip down to Singapore for the first time in almost 20 years and I returned with this book.



Honestly, I haven't heard of Vincent Ng until I saw this book. Supposedly he is a former national athlete in Singapore and is currently now a MediaCorp artiste. Actually I don't know if I should use the word "artiste" considering most reviews about him speaks of how he acts like a block of wood and the only saving grace about him are constant scenes of him topless. I admit, my shallowness got the better of me when I bought the book but I did rant for a long time I wanted to work towards achieving a body like Mr. Ng. The book is a hoot, with language an amateur could beat without trying. But what healthy hot-blooded gay male wouldn't give in to such wanton display of muscular man flesh, right? RIGHT??

7 months later and I am nowhere near this. Don't blame Vince's book though, I am not exactly the most disciplined person when it comes to eating but yet I work out more religiously than religion. One of the reasons why my recent attempt at a relationship failed was because I preferred working out to paktor-ing. When I tell people I am a gym instructor, the first reaction I usually get will be, "Wow, you must have six packs!". Yes I do have six packs, but they come in a convenient bargain of ONE large pack. OK maybe I am being a bit too modest, it's not exactly a large pack but it is not definitely something I would flaunt around shirtless without sucking in my breath. RPM everyday takes a chunk out of my attempts to bulk up but the good side of it is that it keeps me on the lean side, except again, on the abs part.

So now on the seventh month of owning the book and leaving it languishing at my bedside, I am finally making yet another attempt to turn myself into a Vincent Ng clone, just his body that is, heaven forbid, not his wood block acting skills and horrible England. As I told rpmnut, he can't act to save his nuts.

Good luck to me. For the amusement of my readers, here is an excerpt of an interview with Vincent Ng just to show that the only desirable part about him is his body.

Q : Which muscle best describes who you are and why?
Vincent:
“I guess it might be my stomach muscles. Most people I meet in photo shoots normally ask me how I achieve my abs but I actually don’t do much to achieve my six-pack. If you ask me which muscles I like best in my body, I’ll say my back muscles; I think they are neglected hahah!” His manager muttered to us nonchalantly: “Aiyah, Vincent can get a six-pack just by sneezing!” Hahah!

Q : Did you go for any waxing or body hair removal for the photos in the book?
Vincent:
“Never.”

Q : Weren’t you worried about any hairs peeking out?
Vincent:
“They (the photographers) did find a nipple hair lah… the hair on my right nipple is quite long lah… but it can’t be seen in the photo.”

Q : What about the lower part of your body? After all, you wore only briefs in some photos.
Vincent:
“No mah… can’t be seen… ok lah… it’s quite well-hidden. I tucked in everything.” (Stifled chuckles all around at Vincent’s choice of words)

Q : Well, did you trim yourself?
Vincent:
“A bit lah… nothing drastic… I tucked most of them in lah…”

2 comments:

Magus_Young said...

a friend of mine wanted me to get this book but i told him "hello" its a good kopi table book, the guy was a national athlete, martial arts fella (i think) of coz got that bod lah and ehem we're forgetting genetics... marketing smart lah to put that hot cover on...

Elliot T. McBeal said...

Magus: A friend of mine said, "Well, the inspiration is always the most important part...".