Have Some Balls Abdullah

The audacity of that man. In the 2004 elections Abdullah had no hesitation in admitting that the landslide victory of BN was the mandate of the people for his rule. Now that the tide has turned, he has the gall to refuse to resign and say why should he when BN still won the majority to form the federal government? That is likened to the army dictatorship in Myanmar ignoring the will of the people. He's not even clever enough to find a better reason. Koh Tsu Koon had the grace to bow out in the face of Gerakan's defeat. Your mandate has been revoked, so salvage your dignity and just leave. The people have spoken and so have your predecessor, Mahathir. In the past four years you have shown yourself to be nothing more than a weak leader behaving like a senile old fool. Your ineffective and inefficient rule is over.

I Don't Care About The Elections

No, I don't care about the elections, and no, I am not a registered voter. I don't rule out one day I might exercise my rights to vote but right now I rather exercise my rights NOT to vote. Politicians and zealous friends can call people like me irresponsible but I think it takes greater restraint to not take sides. It seems rather pointless to me when I see no one worth voting for. The present government can just shut up because no matter what they say, it is a government divided by thinly veiled racial lines where equality, education and economic policies are concerned. I certainly have no faith in Abdullah Badawi, whom half the time looks like he doesn't know what he's talking about. Makes you wonder how this person stay up there when he answers question like a headless chicken during a recent interview by CNN. The opposition can promise nothing either because they have no experience whatsoever in running a country nor can they set aside their own differences to instill any confidence.

However when it comes to deciding the lesser of several evils, I would deny PAS any votes if I really had to choose. So despite my lack of confidence in the ruling coalition, I will certainly be glad to see them stamped out for good in the coming elections. As it is, the lines between state and religion are already blurred enough. To have this bunch of fundamentalist retards anywhere in the government is a hindrance to development if not a step backward. Hell, PAS should just come up with the tagline, "Vote PAS, think Afghanistan!".

So BN, DAP, PAS or whatever, I can't really be bothered with politics. To me, politics is just like money - by all pure logic, we don't really need it but through some twist in evolution, money has become the sole driving force in human survival. So for the same reasons we have somehow created a dependency on governments and politicians to survive. For the past five thousand years, humanity have created a muck that will take probably another few thousand years to unravel, if anybody is working towards Utopia in the first place. I am just waiting for tomorrow to come and go quickly come so that I don't have to read propaganda in the papers everyday, see eyesore banners in every corner of the streets and listening to silly politicians trying to outdo each other like some adult version of a kindergarten playground. Don't make us any promises because we don't need to hear it. Just shut up and do your job.

Hole In The Head

I don't want to have to deal with this.

I am tired, fed up, angry, disappointed and upset but it's not your fault though I really want to blame you for everything.

You should have had more courage to hold on to me if I was everything you've ever wanted instead of blaming your past.

We all have our pasts, if I can deal with it, why can't you?

I don't want to keep feeling the way I do.

I don't want to keep repeating this painful cycle.

Why am I allowed to feel this kind of happiness when eventually it would be taken away - it's not fair and yes God, I blame You.

I don't know where I am and I don't know where I am going but I know I don't want to be here.

There are no happy endings for people like us - gay men are programmed to be tragic and it spreads like a virus.

I don't want to be noble when all I can feel is how hurt I am and I want to scream at you for the pain you caused me.

I have become too damaged to sustain any more blows.

I have become too jaded to even cry - all the response I could dredge up is numbness.

I don't want to explain to everyone how we're no longer an item and I want to be left alone.