All around me are signs that age is catching up, even if I can afford to deny what I see in the mirror. Well okay, maybe I am not denying so much - I don't have as much hair as I used to have when I was 16 and of late, I can begin to see the vague outlines of crow's feet starting to form whenever I smile. Not good. People who die young, perhaps they are the lucky ones.
Physical aging aside, I managed to catch up on two schoolmates recently on Facebook. If they can have seven new wonders of the world, they should have seven new deadly sins and Facebook included as one of them for excessive but yet amusing waste of time. But I'm moving out of topic again, so back to the two schoolmates. I knew them back when I was in an experimental shithole of a school which ran on a single session. I was 16 then and they were about no more than 13? A bunch of bratty annoying kids - love them to bits. Fast forward 12 years later, I find them on Facebook and one is getting married... TO MY EX-CLASSMATE, while the other is practically a sarong party girl, dating a white guy in Singapore. My reaction? IMPOSSIBLE! Bratty girls simply do not grow up into attractive young women who marry your classmates and date white men. In my mind I still saw them as flat-chested, pinafore-wearing schoolgirls with horrible hair that would make drag queens scream. I felt like I stepped into the Twilight Zone... and it was about to get worse.
Few days ago, an ex-university classmate added me on Facebook as well. On her profile was the picture of a baby. At first I didn't pay much attention, and then I did a second take. Wait a minute, a baby? I clicked on the picture, and found out it had no description. A horrible truth began to dawn on me. I commented on the picture:
"OMG... is it yours?"
Few hours later, a reply came, "Yes. This fella is mine... huahahhaha...".
I didn't add the maniacal laughter, that was indeed her reply. My former flighty as a feather classmate had gotten married to my high school senior and with his help, produced a miniature version of herself. She is now a mother, while I, her cold logical friend who is of higher seniority is currently having commitment phobia and abandonment issues. God indeed has a very poor sense of humour. Despite looking way lot more attractive than I did 3 years ago, I am finding myself hard on reciprocating amorous attention. The irony of it was I could have easily returned such feelings 3 years ago. Now all I am capable of feeling is old, weary and wary.
I need to go practice dying glamorously naked on my bed now - whilst I still look pretty enough.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Funereal Hysteria
As predicted, the "public mourning" for Heath Ledger has died down as news associated with his death begins to drop from the headlines. Barely a week ago I found myself the target for "cyber assassination" for openly criticising the public mourning for an actor whom none of us really know other than the roles he played and what the tabloids report.
"He's dead. He ain't getting any deader. Get over it."
Not that I am being insensitive. It's a tragedy that one so young with such a bright future ahead of him is prematurely snuffed out but that is all there is to it for one among many who doesn't know who Mr. Ledger really is. Closer to home, if anybody really bothered to read the newspapers nowadays, the promising life of a young medical student had also been prematurely terminated in a road accident caused by a bus driver with 30 summonses. As far as I am concerned, she deserved to be mourned as much as Mr. Ledger, but nobody but her family and friends are feeling it. The only difference is she was not some celebrity who frequently made the pages of magazines and entertained us on the silver screen. But she could have been a promising doctor who might have saved plenty of lives if she had lived. So no, I do not believe in mourning for people I do not know, especially foreign celebrities, as influential as they may be.
I also find it strange that people feel for Heath Ledger for the roles that he played and not the life that he led - namely Brokeback Mountain. First of all, Heath Ledger was not gay, and neither was Ang Lee's adaptation of Annie Proulx short story about gay cowboys very realistic either. Remember it was a story written in such a way as to play with one's emotions. Pity that nobody really remembered his role as a gay athlete having to deal with prejudice and coming out in the Australian teen series Sweat which was by far more set in reality. I find "I wish I knew how to quit you" cheesy at best.
Whilst Mr. Ledger is being buried amidst the media circus and mass mourning surrounding his tragic demise, many also seem to have missed the circumstances of his death. Though purely through evidential speculation at the moment, he seem to have overdosed on prescription drugs - a disturbingly common tale associated with celebrities nowadays. Don't get me wrong, I am not belittling those with illnesses that genuinely need such drugs, but people are turning to using prescription drugs as easily as popping a couple of aspirins. Though it is unknown as to whether Mr. Ledger truly needed them, the more nagging question was did he know the dangers of it. There was a lesson to be learned from his death and from many others that died like him, but many seem to be more interested in lamenting how they will never see his presence on the silver screen again while many more turn to drugs because it seems like such a hip thing to do when you are "depressed".
Make no mistake, Heath Ledger was very human. He was a father, a brother and a son. But like every one of us he was just as fallible. To quote Neil Gaiman's The Sandman character Death:
"You lived what anybody gets, Bernie. You got a lifetime. No more. No less. You got a lifetime."
It couldn't be more aptly said. So enough with the howling hysterical sorrow and let the dead sleep.
"He's dead. He ain't getting any deader. Get over it."
Not that I am being insensitive. It's a tragedy that one so young with such a bright future ahead of him is prematurely snuffed out but that is all there is to it for one among many who doesn't know who Mr. Ledger really is. Closer to home, if anybody really bothered to read the newspapers nowadays, the promising life of a young medical student had also been prematurely terminated in a road accident caused by a bus driver with 30 summonses. As far as I am concerned, she deserved to be mourned as much as Mr. Ledger, but nobody but her family and friends are feeling it. The only difference is she was not some celebrity who frequently made the pages of magazines and entertained us on the silver screen. But she could have been a promising doctor who might have saved plenty of lives if she had lived. So no, I do not believe in mourning for people I do not know, especially foreign celebrities, as influential as they may be.
I also find it strange that people feel for Heath Ledger for the roles that he played and not the life that he led - namely Brokeback Mountain. First of all, Heath Ledger was not gay, and neither was Ang Lee's adaptation of Annie Proulx short story about gay cowboys very realistic either. Remember it was a story written in such a way as to play with one's emotions. Pity that nobody really remembered his role as a gay athlete having to deal with prejudice and coming out in the Australian teen series Sweat which was by far more set in reality. I find "I wish I knew how to quit you" cheesy at best.
Whilst Mr. Ledger is being buried amidst the media circus and mass mourning surrounding his tragic demise, many also seem to have missed the circumstances of his death. Though purely through evidential speculation at the moment, he seem to have overdosed on prescription drugs - a disturbingly common tale associated with celebrities nowadays. Don't get me wrong, I am not belittling those with illnesses that genuinely need such drugs, but people are turning to using prescription drugs as easily as popping a couple of aspirins. Though it is unknown as to whether Mr. Ledger truly needed them, the more nagging question was did he know the dangers of it. There was a lesson to be learned from his death and from many others that died like him, but many seem to be more interested in lamenting how they will never see his presence on the silver screen again while many more turn to drugs because it seems like such a hip thing to do when you are "depressed".
Make no mistake, Heath Ledger was very human. He was a father, a brother and a son. But like every one of us he was just as fallible. To quote Neil Gaiman's The Sandman character Death:
"You lived what anybody gets, Bernie. You got a lifetime. No more. No less. You got a lifetime."
It couldn't be more aptly said. So enough with the howling hysterical sorrow and let the dead sleep.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Polis Diraja Malaysia: A Royal Disgrace
Take note that this is not an attack on the Malaysian police as a whole, but I can safely say that with how most of the force are behaving, it is starting to make their conduct questionable. This morning while once again braving the daily morning traffic horror at the LDP Sunway toll, what appeared to be a cop on a motorcycle stopped at the side of my car about 10 meters away from the toll when it was about to be my turn. Without saying anything, he made gestures to what seem like to me that I should follow my queue (which I was), then he proceeded to the same to the other line at the adjacent toll. Just as I was about to enter, he again pulled up at my side. This time I lowered my window to see what was the matter. In a rude tone he said:
"Pergilah tepi! You tak faham kah?" (Move to the side! You don't understand?")
It was then I realised that he was an outrider escorting some VIP. First of all, let me state that I believe that nobody, no matter how important they are, except ambulances or emergencies, should be given way on the road. By the look of how comfy this group of VIPs were in their car, they don't seem to be in any kind of emergency. Like everyone they should suffer like the rest of us stuck in the jam every morning. I mean we pay our taxes as well don't we? And if the VIP is a politician, all the more he/she should feel what the rest of us are feeling. After all, it's their fault for not managing the traffic system well. Take a look at the late Ghafar Baba who always insisted that he should not be escorted by outriders because he doesn't want to inconvenience other people. God rest his soul.
But I digress, I was much taken aback by the rudeness of this cop that I actually yelled back at him, "Belakang pun sudah block! Kalau boleh jalan, jalan sajalah!" (The back is already blocked! If they can move then move!")
Still, I was forced to give way, to not one VIP car, but several others as well in the entourage, further aggravating the jam which already had tempers flaring all around. This won't be the first time I had bad blood with the Malaysian police. Years back when I was still in high school, I had the very unfortunate experience of witnessing police brutality after being forced to participate in a police line-up. Not that I was the victim of their oppression of course. Me and several group of people had their identification cards illegally detained (I didn't know it was illegal then) by the police after what seem like a routine check at an arcade centre. We were told to go to the police station to collect them. We were made to wait in a small room and not told why we there. There was an open door connected to the next room where I could see a disheveled man in handcuffs being harassed by several plainclothes policemen. To my shock, they started assaulting him and told him to squat underneath a desk while one of them rested his foot on him like a footrest!
Never in my life have I ever witnessed with my own eyes a man being treated this way. It was almost as if he was worse than an animal. When the guy who was using him as a footrest saw me looking, he immediately went to close the door, as if he knew what he was doing was not meant to be witnessed by the public. I don't know what crime he has committed then but later did I find out he was a snatch thief after he was "herded" among us in a line-up while two women were brought in to identify him. It was after that incident that I lost my respect for the Malaysian police force in general.
Years later I had the "privilege" to experience police corruption at work after I was stopped for using the handphone whilst driving. My fault of course, and out of fear, I accepted the offer to bribe after he falsely threatened me that my driving license would be revoked on the spot and my driving privileges will be suspended for months pending hearing in court when in truth I would just be issued a summon. I lost RM100 in the process and feeling dirty having participated in the illegal transaction. Last year in May I was also summoned without notice after I was given warning that I cannot drive in a taxi/bus lane near KLCC. I only found out I had a summon after a colleague checked my record online, much to my disgust.
And who doesn't know that our police is already well known for inefficiency? I am sure anybody who had the unfortunate need to report a crime or IC loss will know. My ex had his house broken into once, and all they did was come around few hours later, look around half-heartedly and take a few statements. All that CSI thing you see on TV? I am beginning to wonder if it really does exist. If you are one of the common folk like me, don't expect to ever recover your stolen property, not unless you're a Datuk or Tan Sri, of which a suspect (or scapegoat) will definitely be in hand within the next 48 hours.
Having said that, I am sure they are a few dedicated men of law out there, just that the bad probably outweighs the good. If they are unhappy being underpaid then by all means go do something else. The rest of us have to deal with being unhappy with our jobs, I don't see why we have to deal with their disgruntled manners as well.
"Pergilah tepi! You tak faham kah?" (Move to the side! You don't understand?")
It was then I realised that he was an outrider escorting some VIP. First of all, let me state that I believe that nobody, no matter how important they are, except ambulances or emergencies, should be given way on the road. By the look of how comfy this group of VIPs were in their car, they don't seem to be in any kind of emergency. Like everyone they should suffer like the rest of us stuck in the jam every morning. I mean we pay our taxes as well don't we? And if the VIP is a politician, all the more he/she should feel what the rest of us are feeling. After all, it's their fault for not managing the traffic system well. Take a look at the late Ghafar Baba who always insisted that he should not be escorted by outriders because he doesn't want to inconvenience other people. God rest his soul.
But I digress, I was much taken aback by the rudeness of this cop that I actually yelled back at him, "Belakang pun sudah block! Kalau boleh jalan, jalan sajalah!" (The back is already blocked! If they can move then move!")
Still, I was forced to give way, to not one VIP car, but several others as well in the entourage, further aggravating the jam which already had tempers flaring all around. This won't be the first time I had bad blood with the Malaysian police. Years back when I was still in high school, I had the very unfortunate experience of witnessing police brutality after being forced to participate in a police line-up. Not that I was the victim of their oppression of course. Me and several group of people had their identification cards illegally detained (I didn't know it was illegal then) by the police after what seem like a routine check at an arcade centre. We were told to go to the police station to collect them. We were made to wait in a small room and not told why we there. There was an open door connected to the next room where I could see a disheveled man in handcuffs being harassed by several plainclothes policemen. To my shock, they started assaulting him and told him to squat underneath a desk while one of them rested his foot on him like a footrest!
Never in my life have I ever witnessed with my own eyes a man being treated this way. It was almost as if he was worse than an animal. When the guy who was using him as a footrest saw me looking, he immediately went to close the door, as if he knew what he was doing was not meant to be witnessed by the public. I don't know what crime he has committed then but later did I find out he was a snatch thief after he was "herded" among us in a line-up while two women were brought in to identify him. It was after that incident that I lost my respect for the Malaysian police force in general.
Years later I had the "privilege" to experience police corruption at work after I was stopped for using the handphone whilst driving. My fault of course, and out of fear, I accepted the offer to bribe after he falsely threatened me that my driving license would be revoked on the spot and my driving privileges will be suspended for months pending hearing in court when in truth I would just be issued a summon. I lost RM100 in the process and feeling dirty having participated in the illegal transaction. Last year in May I was also summoned without notice after I was given warning that I cannot drive in a taxi/bus lane near KLCC. I only found out I had a summon after a colleague checked my record online, much to my disgust.
And who doesn't know that our police is already well known for inefficiency? I am sure anybody who had the unfortunate need to report a crime or IC loss will know. My ex had his house broken into once, and all they did was come around few hours later, look around half-heartedly and take a few statements. All that CSI thing you see on TV? I am beginning to wonder if it really does exist. If you are one of the common folk like me, don't expect to ever recover your stolen property, not unless you're a Datuk or Tan Sri, of which a suspect (or scapegoat) will definitely be in hand within the next 48 hours.
Having said that, I am sure they are a few dedicated men of law out there, just that the bad probably outweighs the good. If they are unhappy being underpaid then by all means go do something else. The rest of us have to deal with being unhappy with our jobs, I don't see why we have to deal with their disgruntled manners as well.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
What Logic?
There are things that people sometimes which just defies common sense and logic. Here are some that I come across everyday:
The McDonald's Drive-Through
So the purpose of a drive-through is for a speedy take-away without getting down from the car right? I actually experimented with this after what I thought was a rather lengthy wait in the drive-through. One day during a particularly long queue at the drive-through, I decided to just park my car and get my take-away right at the counter instead. Before I went in, I marked a car in the queue just to see who would be faster, me or the car. 5 minutes later I came out with my order and the car? Still where it was with the driver none too wiser. From that day onwards, no more drive-throughs for me, unless I am pretty sure there was no queue.
The Queue
There will always be those who ladle their food in tiny portions while the long queue at the back of them gets frustrated at their apparent slowness. Why not just take a big scoop and get EXACTLY the portion you want instead of taking it in tiny bits? And speaking of McDonald's earlier, there are also always those who would never consider about what they are ordering while lining up and then proceed to frustrate others at the back when their turn comes by asking, "Uhhh... how big your burger ar??".
The Reverse Parkers
It's quite a common sight to find people do reverse parking in shopping mall car-parks. Never mind that they drive huge big ass clumsy cars which are way too big for them, they also take a hell of a long time going back and forth several times before their car moves into the parking space. I have questioned several of my friends on why they choose to reverse park instead of just driving in head first. Usually the reply would be, "It's more easier for me to come out later". From my own personal experience?
Time it takes to reverse park = 30 - 60 seconds depending on how skillful you are
Time it takes to drive out a car which had been reverse-parked = 10 seconds
Time it takes to drive a car in directly = 10 seconds
Time it takes to drive out a car which had been direct parked = 20 seconds
Seriously.
The McDonald's Drive-Through
So the purpose of a drive-through is for a speedy take-away without getting down from the car right? I actually experimented with this after what I thought was a rather lengthy wait in the drive-through. One day during a particularly long queue at the drive-through, I decided to just park my car and get my take-away right at the counter instead. Before I went in, I marked a car in the queue just to see who would be faster, me or the car. 5 minutes later I came out with my order and the car? Still where it was with the driver none too wiser. From that day onwards, no more drive-throughs for me, unless I am pretty sure there was no queue.
The Queue
There will always be those who ladle their food in tiny portions while the long queue at the back of them gets frustrated at their apparent slowness. Why not just take a big scoop and get EXACTLY the portion you want instead of taking it in tiny bits? And speaking of McDonald's earlier, there are also always those who would never consider about what they are ordering while lining up and then proceed to frustrate others at the back when their turn comes by asking, "Uhhh... how big your burger ar??".
The Reverse Parkers
It's quite a common sight to find people do reverse parking in shopping mall car-parks. Never mind that they drive huge big ass clumsy cars which are way too big for them, they also take a hell of a long time going back and forth several times before their car moves into the parking space. I have questioned several of my friends on why they choose to reverse park instead of just driving in head first. Usually the reply would be, "It's more easier for me to come out later". From my own personal experience?
Time it takes to reverse park = 30 - 60 seconds depending on how skillful you are
Time it takes to drive out a car which had been reverse-parked = 10 seconds
Time it takes to drive a car in directly = 10 seconds
Time it takes to drive out a car which had been direct parked = 20 seconds
Seriously.
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